Not Sure About Day Six

I don't know really what to say about Day Six of the Love Dare. It has been the most confusing day of the Dare so far. "Choose today to react to tough circumstances in your marriage in loving ways instead of with irritation. Begin by making a list below of areas where you need to add margin to your schedule. Then list any wrong motivations that you need to release from your life." I am not even sure I know what that means. I had to read the lesson a few times over. Because of that, I took two days to complete this Dare instead of just one.

The best that I can come up with is that "adding margin" means "taking a break". I looked at it like a piece of paper. There are margins all around the page, white spaces that give the eye a little rest when reading. So I am thinking that to "add margin" to my schedule means I need to build in some break times. That makes sense, especially when it comes to my writing. When I get into a project, I don't like to stop. I don't even like to stop long enough to make dinner for my family. There are times when my writing project becomes more important than anything else in my life. That is definitely something that I need to work on.

My writing is also a place where I know I have "wrong motivations." I'll admit—I have this dream in my head of being as famous for my writing as Karen Kingsbury or J.K. Rowling. It would be wonderful to know that my books, stories, and characters are as well known and well loved as Karen's. And to have the huge financial success that J.K. has had…wow! Yet I know that allowing the fame and fortune to be my motivation would be wrong. If God intends me to have that kind of fame and fortune, He will lead it my way. If I chase after it…. Well, I just don't see much good coming from that.

Instead, I need to focus on why I write in the first place. The big reason—I write because I cannot NOT write. The characters and the stories grow in my head until there is just no room for anything. I have to get them out on paper (or computer screen!).

The even bigger reason I write is why I think those stories get into my head—to reach others for Christ. I don't know if you have read any of my work, but my characters are far from perfect. In my first novel, Joel turned away from a calling to preach and has ignored God for 15 years. In my second, Laura is a single mother, still in love with her 9-year-old daughter's father, a man she never married. In the third, I have characters dealing with rape, drugs, pornography, and adultery. In my not-yet-released fourth novel, the characters are dealing with a 20-year-old crime and the implications that event has on them now. None of these people have perfect lives. Even the ones who have a deep-rooted faith in Christ find themselves doubting Him at times. I believe that God has given me these stories and characters to show the need for a Savior—if we were perfect, Christ would not have needed to give His life for us.

I am not sure that this really relates back to the Love Dare. Then again, I guess it does. The Love Dare is about learning to love your mate and to show that love in and even deeper, stronger, more meaningful way. My writing career can benefit our marriage by taking some of the financial pressures off of my husband. He works hard for our family at a job he doesn't like, a job that doesn't really challenge him intellectually. Keeping my motivation—to reach others for Christ, as I feel He is asking me to do—in front of me as I write, maybe I will be able to bring in enough money to ease that burden on him. Maybe then he would be able to say no some overtime and be able to spend more time at home with his family.

Whether I really got the point of this Dare or not, I don't know. But this is the best that I could do with it.

On to Day Seven. I need to make one list of positives about my husband and one list of negatives. This could get interesting….